Ellie, My Black Cat, Is Depressed

Elphaba Queen of da Nile, better known as Ellie, is devastated. She’d applied for a job as a witch’s assistant but didn’t get the job. Now true, she isn’t authentically a black cat, being in reality a Black Ash i.e. black hair at the tip, pale grey at the root, but still. Being rejected hurts. When the witch – who shall be nameless – sent back Ellie’s application, she wrote Ellie didn’t have the right attitude. As her mommy, I should have read what Ellie wrote on the application before she sent it out. This is my fault.I’m sure what killed the deal was the answer to the question, ‘how do you feel about being my familiar?’ Ellie replied she didn’t want to get familiar with the witch, as she would be merely working for her and not her friend or family. In addition Ellie added, she didn’t want to get dirty, so there would be no riding brooms or climbing down chimneys. She would be willing to continue lounging on a cushion – color of the witch’s choice as long as it was silk – for eight-hours a day, with two fifteen minute breaks and ninety-minutes for lunch.The witch — and I believe that’s spelled with a capital “B” — said Ellie sounded a little too California for her. It’s all my little sweetie can do not to raid the catnip collection and drown her sorrows. I am off to buy her a few new toys and a new chapeau for Halloween. Hope you like last year’s hat! But, darlings, soooo passe!

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